oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
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