So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Randomize
