the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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