I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
