I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
