I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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