he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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