We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
