Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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