My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
