i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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