told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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