I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
