he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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