talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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