You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Randomize
