i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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