Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I met the friendliest cop last night
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
