i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
