I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
