Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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