im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
