I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
