I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
