No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
