Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
