She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
