She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
