we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
