dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
