3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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