I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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