I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
She bit a glass in half.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
