You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
