sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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