Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
