You really coming over, don't trick.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
