Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I just forgot I was standing up.
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