I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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