We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize