It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
