Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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