i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize