those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
