the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize
