: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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