this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
farters have to be the big spoon...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
