im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
