omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
