is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
